Moses Went

The arrival of a New Year often feels like a call to action, immediate action. It’s a race against time, a race against 11:59 pm on December 31st, to not only right your wrongs but to become a new person so your wrongs won’t be repeated. We take on the weight of being our own savior for the New Year, hoping to put to death the things we want to forget and the person we no longer wish to be, all by ourselves.

Shame and guilt often join forces to become a counterfeit source of fuel. They forcefully push you out of the door into the unknown, repeatedly reminding you that you can’t look back at the year(s) before because you “royally screwed up.” You look into the dark and, by instinct, you put on a brave face and decide you’ll move through it and refuse to look at your fears. You tell yourself, “I stopped being afraid of the dark a long time ago,” and you move.

In this thought process, you’ve decided to lean on the one thing that has continued to fail you, yourself.

You move, knowing nothing about what lies ahead. Convinced that your own capability is enough.

It’s predictable. We hit walls. We get frantic. Our eyes ache from straining to see in the dark. Eventually, our counterfeit fuel runs out. We stop. And it is there— shame and guilt are satisfied. This “newness” gets thrown into the junk pile. We return to blaming ourselves, sometimes even God for “allowing” this to happen.

Oh how quickly and conveniently we forget what free will truly means.

I implore you to take a look at what you had with you on that journey. You may have had every piece of equipment that you needed, you may have had the most perfectly curated to-do list or spreadsheet, a weapon of protection in case danger was to come, and the fact that this wasn’t your first time in the dark—all valid.

But I’m sure that there was a crucial part—rather, a person—that you neglected,

your partner.

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Take a look at Moses in Exodus 3 and 4; After God reveals Himself and His plan to use Moses to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, Moses deflects five different times.

1. “Who am I to appear before Pharaoh? Who am I to lead the people of Israel to Egypt?” (Exodus 3:11 NLT)

2. “If I go to the people of Israel and tell them, ‘The God of your ancestors has sent me to you,’ they will ask me, ‘What is his name?’ Then what should I tell them? (Exodus 3:13 NLT)

3. “What if they won’t believe me or listen to me? What if they say, ‘The Lord never appeared to you’?” (Exodus 4:1 NLT)

4. “O Lord, I’m not very good with words. I never have been, and I’m not now, even though you have spoken to me, I get tongue-tied and my words get tangled” (Exodus 4:12 NLT)

5. “Lord, please! Send anyone else!” (Exodus 4:13 NLT)

Each deflection occurs right after an undeniable encounter with God. When Moses should be at his most assured, his most confident, his most willing, he— isn’t. He can’t backtrack and pretend that he didn’t see the burning bush or hear it call out to him… there is no way to hide what has already been revealed.

Exposure has a way of accelerating reluctance. It becomes almost instinctive to narrate in first person, the way Moses has.

We want so badly to remain in doing bad all by ourselves.

For each time Moses deflects and protests, God points Moses back to Himself.

1. “God answered, “I will be with you” (Exodus 3:12 NLT)

2. “God replied to Moses, “I AM Who I AM.” Say this to the people of Israel: I Am has sent me to you…Yahweh, the God of your ancestors…has sent me to you” (Exodus 3:14-15 NLT)

3. “Then the Lord asked him, “What is that in your hand?”… “Perform this sign,” the Lord told him. Then they will believe that the Lord…really has appeared to you…”If they do not believe you and are not convinced by the first miraculous sign, they will be convinced by the second sign.” (Exodus 4:2-8 NLT)

4. “Then the Lord asked Moses, “Who makes a persons mouth? Who decides whether people speak or do not speak, hear or do not hear, see or do not see? Is it not I, the Lord? Now go! I will be with you as you speak, and I will instruct you in what to say” (Exodus 4:11-12 NLT)

5. “Then the Lord became angry with Moses. “All right,” he said. “What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he speaks well… Talk to him, and put the words in his mouth. I will be with both of you as you speak, and I will instruct you both in what to do…and you will stand in the place of God for him, telling him what to say.” (Exodus 4:14-16 NLT)

After God’s final dismantlement, “Moses went.” (Exodus 4:18 NLT)

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Partnership strips you bare of everything you thought you once were.

Partnership stares you in the eyes in the middle of the fight. It doesn’t hit back—it disarms you

Partnership fights differently; it reaches all of your dark corners with light.

Partnership despises complacency; it doesn’t move alone.

Partnership has an answer for everything; every argument collapses.

Partnership is relentless.

Partnership is offensive to the lies you’ve believed.

You’re left in the very state that you’ve tried so hard not to be — cracked open.

God calls that space, willingness.

I and Me become We— partnership is shared direction, shared movement.